I know, I know. Yes, I'm back. No I didn't gain the weight back. For some reason, I took a hiatus from my blog, well, and my exercise routine. But, on my last night of my Hawaiian vacation, I'm returning to my blog, and by Wednesday, I should be back at Curves. How's the weight loss going? Well, I'm down to anywhere between 139-150. Haven't been on a scale in about 2 weeks, so to be honest, I don't know exactly. Guess vacation has to end. But, it's a good thing, I think. Back home, back to reality. Ahh, reality bites. It really does.
Alright, so what have I been up to the past few months besides not going to the gym? Well, to be honest, I've done a lot of playing. A lot of dabbling. A lot of trying. A bit of experimenting. I'm not done playing yet. I don't know how to be serious. I realized about a month ago, that the last 2 guys I've dated, or whatever, have been nice guys. One, I grew bored with and began to duck phone calls and avoid making plans. I had to cut him lose and it killed me when his eyes welled up when I said goodbye. But, I couldn't lead him on. I can't be the asshole that I despise so much. The next one was a great find. This is the type of guy I'm supposed to marry...the guy who I wasn't supposed to meet for a few more years. But, I scared him off by giving him way too many details of my social life too soon. Subconsciencely, I did it on purpose. I'm quite sure of it. I wasn't ready to be done playing. But 2 nice guys I pushed out of my life. 2 guys who opened doors, called when they said they would, were funny, interesting, had a good head on their shoulders, etc.
I'm not ready to grow up. To take responsibility. All I can do is be anal retentive and OCD about a couple of things I obsess about, and those things change almost on a daily basis. My coffee mugs are stored in order by size, refrigerator organized just so, closet organization changes constantly...oy I just realized that this is a control issue...instead of eating and having control that way, I control my space by ridiculous organization.
Oy....I'm going to have to sleep on this to figure this all out...
Clearly, it's not about the food...
Monday, January 5, 2009
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3 comments:
Wow, we really need to collaborate. I hear you loud and clear! Welcome home!
Rach
Hawaii! wow---I was born there before it was a state! (that's how old I am)
did you think about staying? As I sit here in Indiana, the wind chill is 30 below.... hawaii would be nice.
peace, mTw
Over the past few weeks, I've learned that the best diet is by far to catch plague! It doesn't really matter what the actual illness is, Bronchitus, Bird Flu, Typhoid, Bubonic, Cholera, around this time of year everyone that coughs in a restaurant will be rewarded with this new diet plan, believe me, the past two weeks all the servers at "the restaurant that shant be named", myself included, have caught plague, in 3-4 day increments. Didn't eat a bite, lost weight, and not near as hungry upon the return of health.
I'm back online by the way, just wanted to let you konw that the site is no longer dead!
RagingServer.com lives forever...cept when Ribeye catches plague
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